hi, i’m nuri. this is where i’ll post things i’m working on (when i remember to) — whether its music, or musings, or fiction, or video, or live events, or whatever comes next. if you want to follow along, it’s free, or you can choose to pay. you don’t get anything extra if you pay, but you help support me to keep doing the things, and i appreciate it. 💕
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Recent posts
seeing rainbows, seeing stars
i played my show.
maybe when i have a bit more free time i’ll share some clips.
i recorded the whole thing, but my head and chest were cut off.
oof busy
oof, it’s been a minute since i’ve posted.
it’s been a busy time.
i need to do some updating
this is (one of the things) what’s gotten me stuck in the past. i published this site and i already feel like i need to make changes. my, for lack of a better work, “practice” is not necessarily what i thought it would be, and i can see it shifting.
i feel like i should go with that flow, but also without letting go of the things that give me joy.
another queer art party
fresh off the heels of completing another queer art party, i feel gratitude this morning. for community. for connection. for my liberty, at this moment, to commit myself to this work.
I woke up this morning, gently, to the sound of rain and the smell of petrichor, a gentle breeze blowing over my bare skin, and it felt like a gift from Mother Nature, Mother Earth, from the wind, from whichever, any and all aspects of the Divine.
looky here
so, while i haven’t completely abandoned my patreon, i am actively working on moving all of my new posts here to my brand-new website (that just cleaned out my checking account, yay!) but — there’s a lot of content on patreon to move, so it will take me a while to get it all over here.
show(s) (and other stuff) coming
i'm playing a show on june 1. (if you're the facebook type, here's the link there).
the last time i played out was december 2015 — it was a "holiday" concert, a benefit, and we played one song. i don't even remember it. i don't think i have a recording of it anywhere.
maybe moving from patreon? odd thing to post on patreon.
well, last night's anxiety post sure was fun, huh?
i'm not gonna go back down that rabbithole, but just say that it's (hopefully? i think?) being dealt with.
every time i open this lately, or share something from here, i feel more and more like patreon is not the right platform.
fucking taxes
i haven't had the energy to / prioritized posting here lately (i feel like i say this a lot) .
i'm sitting with my anxiety tonight. i know if i go to bed now, i will lie awake and stare at the ceiling with my thoughts spinning from subject to subject.
booking is fun (not really at all, i hate it)
as i've mentioned in previous posts, i haven't performed publicly in some time.
the last time was for a holiday benefit show in 2015 (we use the euphemism "holiday" to refer to the dominant Christian "holiday season" — but it was really a Christmas concert). we played one song. written expressly for the "holidays."
whoops
i meant to share my last post today. that is, i was trying to be good to future me and schedule something ahead so i wouldn't have to think of it — in the hopes that i could keep staying ahead of it so i don't wind up with big gaps like recently (to be fair to me, seemingly losing my entire audience was a bit demotivating, but also, this isn't about audience so — whatevs), but then i hit the wrong button and published it immediately.
the abandoned (ish) uke project
i have a performance coming up.
i don't have a link to share with details yet, but i will certainly post here when i do.
this will be my first time performing in public —in real life — in nearly nine years.
i was gold
I decided to type this on my phone because reasons, and I was gonna make the title "I was good," but I kind of liked the weird autocorrect.
Maybe that will lead somewhere, maybe not.
But I *was* good. I practiced. I added on to a song snippet so I may even have some new new material for the first show I've played in nearly a decade.
today was a lot. it’s been a lot a lot
today was a lot. it’s been a lot a lot lately. today i had to (as usual on a workday) get my kids up and ready for school, and out the door (juuuust) in time for the bus. i had a staff meeting, and then a doctor’s appointment — i forgot to eat.
spring springy spring
i've definitely been less religious (pardon the term) about posting in here lately.
for one thing, i got very busy with work stuff. we had our big spring concert this past weekend, and that's honestly something i'd rather not talk about right now.
been a minute
it's been a minute since i posted here. sorry? (aside: i'm remembering the first time i heard the expression "been a minute" and i was so deeply confused when the person said it cuz i was like "it's been months, what *are* you talking about?!")
unworthy
I was planning on writing earlier today. I had the urge. As soon as i got it, i saw some things that triggered deep feelings of unworthiness. Like, everyone else writes, and puts more effort into it, more craft, more time, and is more deserving — and why do i bother, what do i have that’s worth saying. I’m just a trash person with trash opinions.
liberation now
I’m probably not the first to say this, and i don’t claim this as original thought, but: to realize a liberated future, we must live a liberated now.
There is a fair amount of privilege behind even being able to conceive of such a thing, and, for survival’s sake, our ability to hew to this mantra varies wildly from individual to individual.
i started writing a thing today
i started writing a thing today. it's largely autobiographical, it seems. at least so far. i don't know if i'm going to finish it, but it started from my spinning thoughts as i was going to sleep last night. i had this urge to try to explain all the places i'm coming from. all the things i've experienced that led me to where i am now, what i believe now, what i'm working for now.
getting people together
It’s again been a few days since i last posted. I haven’t made progress on the album project i was hoping to accomplish by the end of February. I did give myself the fallback of finishing it my the end of Adar II, so i suppose that actually gives me until the end of March as it is. Which is good, i could use the extra time.
documenting the mundane
I haven’t posted in a few days. I’ve been busy / didn’t have anything i really wanted to say. I did want to lean into the idea of documenting the mundane, instead of censoring myself and attempting to focus only on the things i think will be interesting to other people to hear about.